Amidst huge outcry, banning and legal threats “India’s Daughter” was aired on BBC Four recently. The embarrassment that Indian government wanted to avoid by imposing a ban on its broadcast, actually caught the attention of most of the major western media outlets. Resultantly, the image of India and particularly Delhi, as a rape capital of the world got cemented forever in the minds of people all around the world and especially among women. That’s no-brainer on the part of the ruling government. Subsequently in the wake of this unsettling tumultuousness, eminent lawmakers, activists, lawyers, opinion shapers, news makers and public in general came out on this issue with full force and energy on different media platforms. Each one of them trying to claim their stake in this tragedy and the aftermath of the movie ban. The tragedy that everybody feels or wants to be a part of.  The entire band wagon with their talking heads were out there fully energized, condemning the ban, expressing the inefficacy of judicial system, blaming the politicians, lawyers, culture and Indian men in particular. Some old some new and some different commentators but same blame game.  Each blaming the other for the failure of our society to protect the dignity of India’s Daughters.  The most enraging part is the exposure of cracks of the system, which is devoid of shame, and so desensitized that it is all right to continue on this never ending  talk on talking points, without any real solution or real plan to catch the bull by its horn.

Why are we all so disconcerted and shocked by the statements given by the perpetrator? Isn’t it obvious that a depraved mind like his wouldn’t have thought otherwise and any differently? Instead of expressing our anger on the interview, we should rather be disconcerted about the thought, the culture and the psychology behind such brazenness. We should rather be enraged by the psychology that practices and propagates inequitable treatment of sons and daughters.  Despite numerous discussions and allocation of funds to fight the crimes against women the crimes have not stopped. Contrarily, after that fateful day, in fact more copycat incidents have surfaced in different parts of the country, where the victims were more viciously attacked and some even murdered. Each time the brutality and bestiality had increased and society could not do anything but to witness everything as an onlooker in outmost shock and despair.

After much thought I have come to believe that this kind of criminal and deviant behavior could not be explained by just pointing fingers and  blaming men, law, government and judicial system.  After all we are a product of a complex fabric of society which is a reflection of our culture, traditions, customs, education and socioeconomic environment. Therefore, we are the ultimate result of these factors which enables us to form an ideology and therefore our identity.  So each time we express ourselves, or act on something we basically express those deep rooted ideologies and self-established psychologies. This also solidifies the notion that not all men are sexual deviants or perverted and mentally distorted criminals. Because I firmly believe in this fact backed by various studies, that ‘no child is born a monster’ and that every man was child once. (Please refer my earlier article on this “No child is born a monster“). But some of those men do turn into violent and unrepentant criminals.  What energizes someone’s latent psyche of deviancy? Why some men behave in a certain manner? These are the questions that cry for answers. Therefore, it’s difficult to brush aside the environmental, developmental, cultural factors as well as personal individual vulnerabilities acting as triggers and enabling criminal behaviors in some.

Henceforth, the psychology that triggers a distorted mind to carry out unimaginable acts of violence against another human being is at the crux of this entire discussion.  The ideology that permits few twisted, distorted and desensitized men to treat another human with such brutality cannot be just left for the lawmakers to correct it. The sadism and barbarism used in those crimes so stirring that even the most toughened among us  could feel the chill down the spine, could not simply be fought with a movie or number of movies but with the change in ideologies on which our social and cultural foundations have been laid. However, mass media can play a very constructive role in spreading reformist awareness and sensitizing people toward others, particularly women through strong and positive messaging. Therefore, the time has come when we need to pause and delve deeper into the psychology of violent offenders and the factors that lead them to commit such heinous crimes. What actually goes through the minds of those violent and unrepentant criminals to do such a thing? What triggers someone’s outmost bestiality to degrade another human being in such barbaric manner? There are numerous questions that are needed to be addressed before we end up beating around the same bush over and over again.

Practically speaking it requires self-introspection at all levels. We need not look elsewhere but within our own selves, our own households, our own family cultures and society at large. This epidemic is a product of all of the above.  It’s a social epidemic and systemic in the deepest layers of our existence. The double and unequal standards with which the Indian society raises its daughters and sons have most of the answers if not all. It should be noted that the society that fails to sensitize its sons toward its daughters would never be able to liberate itself from this epidemic of suppression, torture and brutalization any sooner if not never. The society where sons are raised to exercise dominance, power and ownership, such crimes against women do not come as a surprise. This is the very society which allows rampant discriminations in terms of access to education, healthy food and clothing between sons and daughters especially in lower and financially weaker sections of the society. The society that formulates one set of conduct for the daughters and another more lenient conduct for their sons is bound to create disturbance and uproar due to unequal treatment.

Absurdly, the same society that brags itself of female worshiping has female feticide to an epidemic proportions, which threatens the very health of female to  male ratios, thus worsening the already existing situation further. Here we are talking about the society, where victims of sexual crimes are scrutinized with outmost doubt and degradation and are required to prove their innocence many times over in front of law, judiciary and their families. This is the society where morality has numerous shades and colors. It is the same society where offenders roam scot free and the victims are left to fight for their basic human dignity. Pointedly, some are murdered during the crime and those who survive are rarely given any kind of psychological support to deal with their trauma, in the absence of which most of the traumatized victims find solace in death rather than living.  The same misogynistic society allows the sons to follow different set of rules to enjoy life but prides itself in fixing women, especially those women who break convention and want to enjoy freedom, liberty and dignity. These fixers are men who were brought up in believing that it’s their right and within their power to fix women when these women do not adhere to the convention of cooking and cleaning. Therefore, those sons who, in their own families saw the abuses inflicted toward their own mothers and sisters at the hands of their fathers and other male members, took that baton and made sure to carry it forward whenever they felt the need.  Therefore all kinds of deviants, powerful, angry or perverted found it easier to exhibit their powers on anyone who was out there.  Because for the depraved and violent minds those women were nothing but loose low hanging fruits within their reach and therefore needed to be fixed. Thus they were prowled and pounced on by distorted and depraved minds off guard, unsuspecting and defenseless.  For the deviant psyche those women were nothing but objects to be used, abused and thrown like a trash. Subsequently, this ambivalent morality, the culture of male dominance and absence of proper execution of law in dealing with the sexual offenders has brought this society to the brink of social collapse.

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Furthermore, this misogynistic ideology, the culture of discrimination, abuse, disrespect and objectification of women has put the society on the path of self-destruction.  When children are exposed to domestic abuses, violence and deviant behaviors by adults, grow up with the same ideas and self-expressions with little or no sensitivity toward others thus propelling them to the dark world of crime and distortion, devoid of any regret and remorse. When the right measures are not put into place to correct and counsel deviancy early on, the tendency of self-control and self-examination declines. The individuals who have unsupervised and unabashed morality end up being the most violent perpetrators in the absence of good examples. Additionally, in the absence of corrective environment and positive reinforcements the offenders carry on their wild acts almost with the sense of entitlement. It’s is a dangerous proposition. Other than society and environment mass media further fills in the blanks, and burnishes the thought patterns of already vulnerable and deviant minds. (Read my article : The mass media and its negative influence on the masses)

Additionally, the foundation of one’s social conduct and behavior is laid in the very beginning by their very families, societies and neighborhoods.  Certainly, I am not suggesting that society teaches men to become rapists but undoubtedly there are certain elements in the society that do act as enablers. The elements that are deep rooted in the values and cultures of each family thus reflecting their very conduct and behavior in the society. It should be noted that in the same society most of the men are good decent people, who respect and protect women and lead honest lives. Why is that? Because their value system would have taught them to respect, appreciate and protect women and not brutalize them when found defenseless. They must have been brought up with love, respect and sensitivity and would have seen the same in their families and society around them. Their parents and teachers definitely would have stopped them from any wrongdoings and rewarded them with time and love for responsibility and good conduct. They surely must have been taught at the right time to respect and protect women regardless of their relationship with them. Therefore, the society that advocates good citizenship, responsible behavior, equality and gender sensitization paves way for normal descent conduct and consciousness. This self-consciousness helps people minimize and curtail deviant tendencies.

Ironically the same society has done a tremendous job in raising its daughters. Since the very beginning girls are taught, sense of respect, sensitivity, duty, responsibility, morality, discipline and citizenship.  They are taught not to trespass anybody but to care and respect everybody. However the same society has utterly failed in raising its sons, who in the absence of above mentioned teachings at the right time end up  being twisted, divergent, depraved and debauched for which the entire society has to pay the hefty price, the price which is embarrassing, humiliating and inhuman. The price which is paid by crushing another person’s dignity, vanity and soul. The soul that just happened to be out there!

This discriminatory culture and desensitized behavior toward women is so deeply embedded in the entire subculture that it would take nothing less than a revolution to change it. The same revolution which eradicated sati, child marriage and untouchability from the Indian society.  It should be noted that sati has completely vanished and child marriages and untouchability are on its decline.  However, in this revolution the reform has to come from within, from the family values and the education system which should be designed to teach the value of respect and dignity for all human beings.  It also requires a robust family system which is equitable and just. It needs parents to treat their daughters right. Primarily, it requires parents, teachers and sound government agencies to gather strength and willingness to be equitable to all children without any gender biases.  The society which does not value its daughters at home and the parents who treat their children inequitably are equally responsible for the crimes committed by their children.  If our society keeps on propagating second class citizenry for girls and fails to recognize same standards for everybody, that society most likely would end up being corrupt, disorganized, immoral and chaotic. That society would keep on producing criminals and deviants every single day who would be more unashamed, more unrepentant and more brutal, to the daughters of India, without a doubt.

Conclusively, when any society fails to acknowledge the presence and significance of women and treats them with degradation and disrespect, that society risks its very existence. India’s daughters do not need to be worshipped. They just want to be treated like humans, so that they could hold their heads high with pride and dignity without being violated and brutalized by men who were not taught the right values when it was due. They do not want men to protect them but accept and respect them for who they are and not what they should be. Surely, the daughters of India have been traumatized but they are not defeated, they are here to stay and only psychological revolution of the society can help them achieve that.

Let’s change the psychology!

This topic has truly stirred my thoughts. I am determined to raise awareness about this crime with the help of my website. I am going to discuss about it from time to time to create positive and constructive viewpoints. I therefore ask all of you, who got the chance to read this article, do share your thoughts by posting your comments. This is the least we can do for the victims of such heinous crimes.