The other day I was at the movie theater catching Jurassic World, the dinosaur movie –the latest block buster from Steven Spielberg.  As it was IMAX theater the seats get filled in fast so people generally line up to get the best seats to have the maximum viewing pleasure. People are generally courteous and nice, and do not push and shove but sometimes try to gently outrun you. But it’s all right. I don’t mind it.

While we were waiting, people had nothing to do, but to wait and let the time pass. There were children with their parents, married couples, unmarried couples, lovers, students, grandparents and individuals from all walks of life.

Almost everybody I know now carries some kind of mobile device, if not smartphone. I see people on their mobile device all the time and in most unusual places. I know few people who cannot part with their phones even during nature’s call. It’s not hard to see people using it in restaurants while eating, while driving (the most dangerous), in the movies, in shops, while walking and so on. The bottom line is, it has proliferated in our daily lives so much that we can’t imagine a life without it. So to continue with our movie theater story further, people kept filtering in and the moment they would settle down at a spot, it was not difficult to see their heads buried in their phone screens; younger people more engrossed in their screens than the older generation.

I vividly remember a young couple in their mid-twenties. The moment they entered the waiting area, they were immediately on their smartphones. They were standing with each other, but completely glued to their personal devices, exchanging occasional glances or giggles triggered by the content of their respective screens, rather than their own little chit chats or personal exchanges. Traditionally, people used to go out to spend time together and catch up with some meaningful conversations with each other, and spend some quality personal time together, but not anymore. The technology always accompanies us wherever we go. Smart phones have become our constant companion—a permanent fixture in our personal world and an indispensable one. Probably, that is how the modern relationships are being nurtured; the presence of virtual third being forever in almost everyone’s life.

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At the same waiting spot, not only young couple but teenagers with their parents were even more interesting to watch. I particularly noticed a family of five, mother, father, two sons, and a daughter. I cannot forget this family because the sons had created a huge ruckus by gaming online on their phones.  Their excitement was audible to all, triggered by their respective wins, and losses in their games. It was hard to tell, whether their excitement was more for the movie that they were going to watch or the mere freedom and enthusiasm to play online in public. That was them. The daughter was lost in her own device and kept a smiley face throughout, again depending on the content of her screen. The parents were watching the kids, and occasionally checking on their own devices. It was a full circus in progress, and so amusing, and at times so annoying to view the inroads, and penetration as well as the spell technology has on people in modern times.

The purpose of this article is also to remind you and myself the changing nature of human behavior and evolution of a new kind of relationship, which requires people to be around, but not much involved in the details of the environment. There is time but not enough to participate in casual chit chats with other people irrespective of the relationships that they have with each other.  Increasingly this new technology has reduced the personal interaction, and  the conversation time between people; we now text more than we talk.  We prefer to talk via social media rather than actual conversation on phone or in person.  Amusingly, I have even seen married couples living under the same roof wishing birthdays and anniversaries via social media. This is new normal and is here to stay or would change for something different in future. Only time will tell. The space and the attention that people used to have for family and friends has been partially taken over by technology in one way or the other.

The traditional relationships that I am so accustomed to has not disappeared entirely, but taken a new form. It’s imperative that sometimes change takes place without us realizing the extent of it. It slowly changes the relationship without any visible improvement or deterioration in the quality of the relationship. Vast majority of people would not accept that technology has affected their personal relationships with their loved ones, but in reality we cannot ignore the fact that we now have a virtual third entity to go to with or without real people. The fun filled trips that we used to make to our friends and family to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries or any other social calls, are now almost entirely taken over by social media sites, where people convey their wishes, post about their current status, and post their pictures to enjoy instant gratification. It is certainly more instantaneous now due to availability and access to smartphones and other mobile devices such as I pads and tablets. Notably, we live in the world of instant everything. A few years ago this was not possible. There had to be a personal touch either via phone, letters or personal visits.

It’s hard to say how technology has affected people’s relationship with people, but we have already launched ourselves on a path where technology is going to be as a third entity in any relationship. From toddlers to elderly, from east to west, from poor to rich– everybody wants their share in this pie. They all want to use it for business, and for pleasure, irrespective of their language, color, caste, class, and nationality. Technology is blessing as well as bane to society, based on individual’s personal experiences. However, it is almost impossible to go back to the old world simply because everyday some new technology is evolving and along with it, we are evolving both psychologically and behaviorally.  It’s quite impossible to say what shape our relationship is going to take in future, but one aspect is clear, it will not be as it used to be. Good, bad or ugly only the time will tell.

The basic feelings of love, fear, joy, compassion would certainly remain in its best form possible, but the presence of technology in our lives would change the way we experience and express those feelings. It has already changed our style of social interactions and communications. The willingness and thrill of being connected to the world as well as the fear of being left out, and left alone  is the driving force behind this psychology. It’s good to be connected, but it would be great to have personal touch. Technology is a blessing in itself, however, too much usage would take away the vital personal touch necessary for the continuation and enrichment of any relationship.

Conclusively, it’s quite difficult to determine the effects of smartphones on our relationships. However, it’s quite impossible to assume that it will have no effect at all. It depends mostly on individuals themselves and how they have adapted to this new revolution of technology, and their own evolution along with it. Furthermore, a virtual happiness, and sadness cannot give us the same experience as the real people and real feelings would give. Human touch and human feelings have the power to humanize us and our forthcoming generations. It’s much more superior feeling compared to the virtual world and everything that comes with it. Therefore, I leave the conclusion on the readers and ask you to share your thoughts on this matter.